This is some hilarious shit.

For those who demand only the best of what life has to offer, the exclusive Visa Black Card is for you. The Black Card is not just another piece of plastic. Made with carbon graphite, it is the ultimate buying tool.

But wait there’s more, you also enjoy these privileges:

• Limited Membership
• 24-Hour Concierge Service
• Exclusive Rewards Program
• Luxury Gifts
• Patent Pending Carbon Graphite
• Annual Fee $495

And here’s more information on this fabulous patent pending break through:

The Black Card is made with carbon graphite, creating a more durable card, guaranteed to get you noticed.